Are You Committing Microaggressions? (+ How to Handle Them)

What is a microaggression? How do you respond to microaggressions? How can you avoid committing a microaggression? All these questions and more are answered in this academic meets public explanation (nothing like the rest of my posts!). LGBTQ+ issues are important to me, however, which is why I have a dedicated section here. Let me know if you have any questions in the comments, or anything to add!

There will be video formats of a lot of these points in short form on Instagram if you’d rather watch those, but they will be out much slower.

What is a Microaggression?

Everyday slights, snubs, insults, comments, or questions that communicate hostile or derogatory messaging to marginalized people. There’s a huge list of examples below.

Brief History of Microaggressions

The term microaggression was first coined in the 1970s by Chester M. Pierce, a Black Harvard psychiatrist, in relation to the more insidious forms of racism that Black people face. (DeAngelis, 2009). It has been built on over the years from people like Dr. Claude Steele (who showed that Black people and women perform worse on academic tests when primed with stereotypes about race or gender – there’s several articles that support this, not just one), Dr. John (Jack) Dovidio and Dr. Samuel L. Gaertner (who demonstrated across several studies that many well-intentioned White people who consciously believe in and profess equality unconsciously act in a racist manner, particularly in ambiguous circumstances), and now Dr. Derald Wing Sue (who has proposed three types of racial microaggressions – microassaults, microinsults, and microinvalidations). Over the years, the research went into other minorities (Nadal, 2013; Nadal, Skolnik and Wong, 2012; Sue, 2010), which is where LGBTQ+ research comes in. 

Three Types of Microaggressions

Microassaults, typically, are deliberate attacks to explicitly hurt the individual or the group being addressed. The goal of these assaults is to threaten or demean the target individual or group (Sue, 2010). (e. g. using slurs in everyday speech despite knowing it is harmful)

Microinsults are behaviours or messages that are typically outside the perpetrator’s awareness (Sue, 2010; Torino et al., 2019). The underlying sense of these communications is insulting, rude, or insensitive. (e. g. You must have a lot of s*x (to a bisexual)/assuming they are just greedy) 

Microinvalidations are messages that exclude or deny the experience, emotions, or thoughts of an individual (Sue, 2010; Torino et al., 2019). They could be intentional or not, but they ultimately undermine other people’s experience. (e. g. You are being too sensitive).

Are Microaggressions Really That Big of a Deal?

Some people disagree that microaggressions are rampant or cause as much harm as we claim. It’s the responsibility of the minority to respond with empowerment or education, and their reaction is not the fault of the perpetrator, they claim. Which, no, their response is not the responsibility of the other person, but creating the unsafe space in the first place IS, especially if they fight against learning about it. 

In fact, some critics maintain this fear of saying the wrong thing restricts interactions between people of different social groups and that it enforces a victim mentality, which is only true if you silence the minorities and don’t let them advocate for themselves (Anzani, 2021).

There are plenty of interactions and ways to talk to people that don’t feed into microaggressions, stereotypes, stigma, or prejudice. And if someone says the wrong thing, it’s more kind to listen and learn from what they’ve done wrong rather than project and say “it wasn’t my fault.” It doesn’t matter what the intent was – if you’ve hurt or upset someone you apologize and take steps to do better.

Why Do Microaggressions Matter?

Overt forms of discrimination have become less socially acceptable, but that doesn’t mean discrimination has ceased to exist. These communications (microaggressions) can make people feel as if they don’t belong, that they are abnormal or that they are untrustworthy, and, in some cases, make them feel pressured to be a positive “role model” for their entire group of minority people (DeAngelis, 2009).

Additionally, health disparities and barriers in accessing care for lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) individuals are well documented in the literature (Addis et al., 2009; Burgess et al., 2007; Cochran & Mays, 2000; Dhejneet et al., 2016; McCarthy et al., 2014; Seelman et al., 2017, Torino et al., 2019). Some health disparities are greater in LGBTQ (queer) youth, who are known to have a higher prevalence of substance abuse, homelessness, and suicide (see Nadal, 2013 for a review). Many studies have found that the more that people experience microaggressions, the more likely they are to report symptoms of depression, psychological distress, and even physical health issues (Nadal, et al., 2011).

LGBTQ+ microaggressions are so pervasive even trained therapists can inadvertently commit them (Anzani, 2021). Given this knowledge, it is even more important for us to try to minimize LGBTQ+ microaggressions (really, all) and make the world a better, safer place for them.

Some concrete examples in media include people deadnaming (using birth name when a person has changed their name) and misgendering celebrities, law enforcement reports, and interactions in movies and tv. Caitlyn Jenner is one clear example of deadnaming and misgendering, and even Laverne Cox has had similar worries. From Jan. 1, 2015 to 2018, 65 different law enforcement agencies investigated murders of transgender people, and in 74 of 85 cases, victims were either misgendered or dead named according to Propublica (Waldron & Schwencke, 2018). Even movies like Happiest Season, which were directed at LGBTQ+ audiences, had microaggressions galore (when the parents ask if Abby has a boyfriend, etc.).

Are Microaggressions Always Bad?

LGBTQ+ microaggressions don’t bother everyone in the LGBTQ+ community, partly because there are macro aggressions (e. g., physical violence) and, for some people, those are what is bad. 

However, microaggressions still build. And build. And build (watch this great youtube video on it) – which is a big problem, especially when it comes to mental health and younger people, as briefly explained before. Even seeing microaggressions or stereotypes in the media can reinforce internalized prejudices in LGBTQ+ people. (e. g., maybe I really haven’t met the right man).

Even though they do not “bother” some LGBTQ+ people, they often invalidate, threaten, demean, or intimidate people. They are not always intentional, but it’s important to learn about them because of their effects on the majority of people.

Examples of Microaggressions (LGBTQ+ Specific)

These LGBTQ+ microaggressions are sometimes spoken, but a lot of them can be insidious thoughts – we appreciate you not speaking them, but if you have them, consider delving into that.

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